Flannery O’Connor: A Prayer Journal

Below are two excerpts from Flannery O’Connors A Prayer Journal.

Looking back over what I’ve published to this blog, I’m surprised that I’ve made no mention of Flannery  O’Connor. I have such a deep respect for her work and faith. I think of all her writings, A Good Man is Hard to Find and The Habit of Being are the most memorable for me. She was a brilliant writer. And what strikes me the most about her prayer journal is how humble and childlike her faith was. She gives me courage.

9/25   What I am asking for is really very ridiculous. Oh Lord, I am saying, at present I am a cheese, make me a mystic, immediately. But then God can do that–make mystics out of cheeses. But why should He do it for an ingrate slothful & dirty creature like me. I can’t stay in the church to say a Thanksgiving even and as for preparing for Communion the night before–thoughts all elsewhere. The rosary is mere rote for me while I think of other and usually impious things. But I would like to be a mystic and immediately. But dear God please give me some place, no matter how small, but let me know it and keep it. If I am the one to wash the second step everyday, let me know it and let me wash it and let my heart overflow with love of washing it.

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Dear God, In a way I got a good punishment for my lack of charity to Mr. Rothburg* last year. He came back at me today like a tornado which while it didn’t hurt me too much yet ruined my show. All this is about charity. Dear Lord please make my mind vigilant about that. I say many many too many uncharitable things about people everyday. I say them because they make me look clever. Please help me to realize practically how cheap this is. I have nothing to be proud of yet myself. I am stupid, quite as stupid as the people I ridicule. Please help me to stop this selfishness because I love you, dear God. I don’t want to be all excuses though. I am not much. Please help me to do Your Word oh Lord.

*A fellow workshop student.

Author: Rebekah Durham

Rebekah Durham lives in Atlanta, Georgia with her three children.  She is a graduate of Columbia Theological Seminary and has written for numerous publications. She is an avid reader and in particular an admirer of C.S. Lewis, Thomas Merton, G.K. Chesterton, Henri Nouwen, and Dorothy L. Sayers (in no certain order). She'd also blindly follow Miss Marple (Agatha Christie's famous spinster sleuth) anywhere she wanted to go. View all posts by Rebekah Durham